Archive for March 31, 2014

I ate the last beef

Weather: Warmer again with a chance of rain

Trail Conditions: 45+ today again, they will be getting softer

The beefs are gone, I ate the last one LOL.  We had a few people in yesterday and it wouldn’t surprise me if we still get a few more here and there, but for the most part we are done.  I didn’t even see the fat lady coming but she did stick a fork in us.  Great year condition wise, we lasted until the last day.

It is legal to ride the DNR Multi Purpose trails, but trails that use forestry land or private property are closed.

Thank you again for stopping by this winter and hopefully I will see some of you agin soon on ATVs or Bikes.



After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked in a mirror,
remembering her times with Bill Clinton. 
Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.
In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help...
"God, if you take away my love handles, I'll devote my life to you," she
And just like that, her ears fell off

See ya in about 9 months I guess

Weather: Warmer yet

Trail Conditions: 45+ today

What a depressing day yesterday was, all the people that said “see ya next year”.  Well it is that time again folks, I’ll have a few in today I am sure but for the most part snowmobile season 2013 is over.  Our 7th year owning the bar.  We have met a lot of new friends and only came across about 9 or 10 assholes over that time.  So I guess that means about 99.999% of snowmobilers are fantastic people and some have come to be very good friends of ours.

You know if half of you would buy side by sides and ATV’s and come up here in the summer time we wouldn’t have to wait 9 more months.  We are going to continue working on the ATV trails up here, we have a ways to go to get the ATV program up to where the snowmobile program is, but we are working on it.  It will come but it takes time, hopefully we all have a lot of time left.

Thank you all again from all of us at the Bay Bar, we appreciate each and everyone of you and hope to see you next year, if not sooner.

A shout out to my buddy Beer Belly Bob …….. “You can have Becker but the Princess is all mine buddy”

The Christian Way to Call Someone a Bastard
A guy was getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a second golfer approached and asked if he could join him. The first said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome.
They were even after the first few holes. The second guy said, “We’re about evenly matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?” The first guy said that he wasn’t much for betting, but agreed to the terms. 
The second guy won the remaining sixteen holes with ease.
As they were walking off number eighteen, the second guy was busy counting his $80.00. He confessed that he was the pro at a neighboring course and liked to pick on suckers. The first fellow revealed that he was the Parish Priest.
The pro was flustered and apologetic, offering to return the money. The Priest said,
“You won fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your winnings.” 
The pro said, “Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”
The Priest said, “Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation……

And, if you want to bring your mother and father along, I’ll marry them.” 

Warm agin but the trails are fine

Weather: Warmer

Trail Conditions: Warm but trails will survive

Holy crap we had a bit of a melt down yesterday.  But everyone said the trails were in great shape.  When I left on my ride a few weeks ago it was 55 degrees out, but everything was good, the first few days of a warm up is no big deal, the trails may get soft but still very enjoyable.  Nice riding with your coat open for a change.  Today and tomorrow will be just fine but look out for Monday, they are calling for an inch of rain.  But who cares right?  It was a great season for riders except for the fricken cold.

Once again, thanks all of you that came in this year, even the three people that rated me 1 star of facebook LOL.  Next time order the beef LOL



Weather: warmer

Trail Conditions: Fresh snow and mild temps

There is a lot of slush out on the Lake. Yesterday an older couple got stranded and needed help just getting out of the slush, their sleds are still out there. DO NOT cross the Lake to get to the Root Cellar, use the trail system. 

WTF Only 3 inches

Weather: Looks like only 3 inches

Trail Conditions: Fresh snow and mild temps

What would you do if you were told you were getting 8 inches and you only got 3?  Actually I guess it happens all the time.  Look on the bright side though, fresh snow, mild temps and I got more beefs.  See ya soon, get your asses up here for one last ride………

Sleeping With Bob
The snowmobilers were all at Lake Gogebic Motel. No one wanted to room with Bob, because he snored so badly. They decided it wasn’t fair to make one of them stay with him the whole time, so they voted to take turns. 

The first guy slept with Bob and comes to breakfast the next morning 
with his hair a mess and his eyes all bloodshot. 

They said, “Man, what happened to you? He said, “Bob snored so loudly, 
I just sat up and watched him all night.” 

The next night it was a different guy’s turn. In the morning, same 
thing, hair all standing up, eyes all bloodshot. 

They said, “Man, what happened to you? You look awful! He said, ‘Man, 
that Bob shakes the roof with his snoring. I watched him all night.” 

The third night was Fred’s turn. Fred was a tanned, older cowboy, a 
man’s man. The next morning he came to breakfast bright-eyed and 
bushy-tailed. “Good morning!” he said. They couldn’t believe it. They 
said, “Man, what happened?” 

He said, “Well, we got ready for bed. I went and tucked Bob into bed, 
patted him on the butt, and kissed him good night. Bob sat up and 
watched me all night.” 

With age comes wisdom.

3-6″ or 4-8″, Whatever makes you Happy

Weather: Snow coming in today

Trail Conditions: Fresh snow and mild temps

What sucks is the snow that is forecasted for next week.  Without snowmobilers who the hell needs more snow?  It looks like we got another foot or more coming next week.

This weekend should be good, we hope to see a lot of you one more time.  I am not sure how many other business owners tell you thank you for coming to the UP, but Becker, Kristie, Tammy, Wally, Jolene and I want to thank all of you that stopped by this year.  I went out for only 4 days and spent over $1000 on my little ride, I know how expensive it is to come up here and snowmobile.  Thank you very much for stopping by and seeing us.

Last weekend to ride, looks like it will be a good one

Weather: in the 30’s

Trail Conditions: Very Good and snow on the way

Looks like it will be a good weekend, fresh snow and mild temps.  Trails should be good, they may be a little loose with the warm temps but low traffic should keep them in pretty good shape.  I ordered more beef so come on in and get the last ones of the season….



Snow Thursday, just in time for the weekend

Weather: Thursday 4-8 maybe more

Trail Conditions: I heard they are excellent

Our last “official” weekend of snowmobiling is getting some help on Thursday with 4-8 inches of snow and maybe more.  I got beef coming today so come on in and try to run me out.  Princess I ordered a whole case, just for you…….

See ya soon, I’m headed to Antonio’s for Breakfeast……………

The Last snowmobile weekend coming up

Weather: Warmer and snow for the weekend

Trail Conditions: I heard trail 13 still sucks

Check out the weather forecast for this coming weekend, snow and mild temps.  Need I say anymore?

Get your asses up here, I’m ordering more beef today and I don’t want to save it for 9 months and serve it to you next year…….


So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter, 
a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day…
About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, 
unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, 
yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
I said pleasantly, ‘Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart. 
Nice children you have there. Are they twins?’ 
The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 
‘No, they ain’t twins. The oldest one’s 9, and the other one’s 7. 
Why would you think they’re twins? Are you blind, or stupid?’
I replied, ‘I’m neither blind nor stupid, Ma’am, 
I just couldn’t believe someone slept with you twice. 
Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.’

OK so I am a Dick

Weather: Colder today

Trail Conditions: Should be good for another week

I had one guy complain about Trail 1 down by Presque Isle, that is the only complaint I have heard about the trails.  I borrowed a case of beef so I will have some for today and tomorrow, I will get another order in on Tuesday, so I will have beef for next weekend.  Sorry to the people who were in yesterday after I ran out.  I sold a lot of beef this weekend.

I got called a Dick last night from a guy at the bar.  Why is it the beginning and the end of the season always seems to bring out the worst in people? Late last night I had a crowd in that was listening to music and having a good time, this guy starts banging his glass on the bar to the beat of the music, I asked him politely, at least I thought I did it politely, to please not bang his glass on the bar.  The next thing I know he jumps up and gets dressed and tells the lady he is with that they have to go because the bartender is a DICK.  So I guess I can expect another 1 on my Facebook Rating LOL.