Archive for July 31, 2014

Nice days, great nights

Weather: High 70’s and clear

Trail Conditions: Ready

Last day of July today, something like 122 days before the snowmobile trails open.  We had kind of a late summer with winter dragging on like it did, but lately here the weather has been great.  Not too many hot and humid days, and the nights have been fantastic.  The mosquitos have tapered off a lot, in fact they have not been bad at all.  Lake Gogebic has warmed up a lot so swimming is great too.  If you want to see us when everything is green instead of a white frozen tundra now would be the time. Or you could wait another 10 weeks and come up for an atv ride when the colors of the trees are in full bloom.


Once upon a time, Three Little Pigs walk into a bar. The first pig orders 10 beers, downs them, and then asks for the bathroom. The second pig orders 15 beers, downs them, and asks for the bathroom. The third pig orders 20 beers, downs them, and then sits there eating peanuts.

“Aren’t you going to ask for the bathroom?” asks the bartender.

“Nope. I’m the pig who goes wee-wee-wee all the way home.”

Turkey on a Wednesday?

Weather: 70 and clear

Trail Conditions: Lonely, not an atv in sight

It would be a gorgeous day for a ride out on the trails, unfortunately I only have one open seat and 3 brothers, a mother and 4 nieces that need a place to sit.  Oh well I guess that is why they took off to Copper Harbor today. Beautiful day for a ride though.

Other than that not much else going on, turkey for dinner tonight, on a Wednesday yet, who would have thought.


A message from Skip Shultz

Weather: Mild and 30% chance of rain

Trail Conditions: Nice week for a ride

Not much to talk about today and I can’t find a good joke to post.  So I am posting an email From Skip Shultz instead.

TO:  Upper Peninsula ORV Trail Development Association Members, Associates, Friends
FR:  Skip Schulz, UP ORV TDA President
RE:  Association Annual ORV Ride, UP ORV TDA/WUPTA Veterans Outdoor World Vets Ride, Association Update
DT:  Monday, July 28th, 2014
UP ORV TDA 3rd Annual ORV Ride, THIS Saturday, August 2nd:
Attached is the information on our Association’s 3rd Annual Summer ORV Ride.  This years ride is being hosted by SORVA-Chippewa County.  We invite ALL ORV Riders to participate in the ride.  It will not only be a lot of fun, but is taking place in a very scenic area.   They will have both a short ride and a long 100 mile ride for you to choose.  The ride starts at 9:30 am ET, with the Tahquamenon Motel having a Hot Dog Roast after the ride.  Please contact our Association VP, Grant Dewitt of the Tahquamenon Motel for more information:  906-876-2388.  
UP ORV TDA-Western UP Trails Association Veterans Outdoor World  “Run for the Colors”Vets ORV Ride, Sept 27th-28th:
Veterans Outdoor World is an organization that hosts events in the outdoors for ALL Veterans.  While Veterans Outdoor World has hosted many Fishing and Hunting events, this fall, the UP ORV TDA and WUPTA invited this organization to help us get the word out on the “Run for the Colors” ORV Ride.  The ride is going to depart from Wakefield on Saturday Morning, Sept 27th, and ride to Lac Vieux Desert Resort/Casino in Watersmeet.  Those that want to will then take a ride down to Land O Lakes, Wisconsin.  That night we’re going to have an outdoor style dinner.  At the dinner we’re going to be giving away prizes, hear from speakers, and have a lot of fun!  Later that night, we’re going to take a ride to see the mysterious Paulding Light for those that want to see this.  Then on Sunday Morning, Sept 28th, we will ride back to Wakefield.
Lac Vieux Desert only has a limited amount of rooms.  Those with Veterans credentials will be able to reserve one of the 30 rooms we have booked for only $39.99/night.  However you will have to call and tell them that you are with the UP ORV TDA Veterans Outdoor World Vets Ride to reserve your room, and tell them if you are a Veteran.  Lac Vieux Desert also has a limited amount of Camping spots.  Camping is also available in Marenisco.
The ride is FREE for EVERYONE, Veteran or not.  Food on Saturday Night is FREE for the Veterans, provided by Lac Vieux Desert Resort Casino.  Prizes will be furnished by different sponsors, including our major sponsor, Lake States Resource Alliance.  We are working on getting Side by Sides for the Veterans tor ride in.  While any sponsorship of the event and to get prizes is greatly appreciated, your help in getting the word out and PARTICIPATING in the ride is appreciated and very important. 
Our goal is to show our Veterans, current and past, how much we appreciate their service.  With the hope of a successful turnout this year, we hope to make this an annual ride.  This ride is taking place on Michigan’s Fall No ORV Trail Sticker required weekend, so everyone does not need an ORV Trail Sticker to participate in this ride. 
We want to thank our member-club, Western UP Trails Association, Michigan DNR, Michigan Department of Veterans Affairs, Ottawa National Forest, Lac Vieux Desert Tribal Community, David and Nicole Kohn of Veterans Outdoor World, and Lake States Resource Alliance for all their help!
UP ORV TDA News/Issues/Update:
This summer our clubs have been busy working and maintaining trails from one end of the Upper Peninsula to the other.  It is the UP ORV TDA officers, board members, and clubs that have attended MANY meetings throughout the State of Michigan and the entire Midwest.  After taking a leadership role in getting legislation passed to allow for specific sections of State Highway Right of Ways, Bridges, and Shoulders being opened up, we have seen our clubs, and even those that are not members of the Association take advantage of this new legislation.  We are also seeing progress in getting Michigan County Forests opened to ORV Trails, due to legislation our Association got passed.  While our Association did not support the increase in the ORV Trail Sticker Fee’s, we are now monitoring to see where those dollars are going, and currently are working on getting some of those dollars put into new trails, maintained by new clubs.  While the Association did get the DNR to agree to an ORV Trail Signing Program using 1-3 alphabetical letters, that signing program is voluntary.  Now we are meeting with the DNR and the ORV Advisory Workgroup as to establishing the naming/identification of those trails and ORV Trail Signing.  Our Association members continue to work with the US Forest Service in getting Hiawatha and Ottawa to open up forest roads to ORV’s. 
This December, the UP ORV TDA will host the Winter meeting with the Wisconsin ATV Association and the ATV Association of Minnesota.  That meeting will take place on December 4th in Ironwood, hosted by WUPTA.  The UP ORV TDA is proud to have attended the meeting of the 3 Associations in Wisconsin and Minnesota, and are proud to host the next meeting.  It is at these meetings that the 3 Associations discuss regional (MIdwest), along with Naional issues.  We are discuss ways to develop inter-connecting trails.  One of the ideas that we have is to have an ORV Ride from Northern Minnesota all the way to (and possibly over) the Mackinaw Bridge.
However we just learned of a set-back on the work that the Lower Peninsula ORV Association had been working on and that is to organize an ORV Ride this fall over the Mackinaw Bridge.  The setback happened this past week when one of the volunteers working so hard on this, John Chad, passed away from Pnemonia. 
All these issues were built on the very same premise that many people talked about years ago, that was to UNITE our sport and bring people TOGETHER.  “Together we’re better AND STRONGER.”  That is why the UP ORV TDA was formed years ago, and that is why we NEED YOUR membership.  Whether it is as a family, a business, a chamber, tourism association, or a club…our only source of doing all this work and putting on these events is through membership.  From a donation of $25.00 for an individual or family, to $50.00 for a business, $100 for a chamber or club…every little bit helps.
Please send your membership too:
P.O. Box 114
Hulbert, MI  49748
Kindly ask the club you are a member of whether they are a member of the UP ORV TDA or not.  If they are not, please ask them to join the Association.
Skip Schulz
UP ORV TDA President
610 Greenland Road
Ontonagon, MI 49953

Sunshine all week long

Weather: Looks great

Trail Conditions: Nice week for a ride

Forecast for this week looks very nice.  May be a pontoon ride is in our future. Dinner was great last night.  My ribs turned out awesome if I do say so myself. Kristie is working today so I can spend time with the brothers.  Not sure what we are doing today, the boys were talking about a trip to Copper Harbor maybe.


Bubba dies in a fire and his body is pretty badly burned. The morgue sends for his two best friends, Daryl and Gomer, to identify the body.

Daryl arrives first, and when the mortician pulls back the sheet, Daryl says, “Yup, his face is burnt up pretty bad. You better roll him over.”

The mortician rolls him over, and Daryl says, “Nope, ain’t Bubba.”

The mortician thinks this is strange. Then he brings Gomer in to identify the body. Gomer takes a look at the face and says, “Yup, he’s pretty well burnt up. Roll him over.”

The mortician rolls him over and Gomer says, “No, it ain’t Bubba.”

The mortician asks, “How can you tell?”

Gomer said, “Well, Bubba had two assholes.”

“What? He had two assholes?!” exclaims the mortician.

“Yup, every time we went to town, folks would say, ‘Here comes Bubba with them two assholes.'”

Ribs, it’s what’s for dinner

Weather: Ah we’ll see, so far no rain

Trail Conditions: A little bit of mud

Had a great day with Mom, the brothers and nieces yesterday.  We all sat out by the fire till after midnight, mosquitos weren’t bad at all.  When Becker and I got home we sat outside watching the light show in the sky.  Clouds to the north and stars right above us, when the lightning flashed is was a pretty cool show.  Baby back ribs on the grill today for dinner today, I gotta go get busy cooking.

A man and his wife are at a restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin at a nearby table.

His wife asks, “Do you know her?”

“Yes,” sighs the husband. “She’s my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after we divorced seven years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.”

“My God!” says the wife. “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”

What’s for dinner Momma

Weather: Nice today, crappy this morning

Trail Conditions: A little bit of mud

Well it is the weekend Mom and I have been waiting for, my 3 brothers are coming to town.  It has been a while since we were all together last.  Beef today, baby back ribs tomorrow and turkey on Monday.  Oh and there may be a few beers drank in between there.  The weekend looks so so, but we will have fun just the same.

Chinese: “Me not come to work, me sick.”Boss: “When I’m sick I have sex with my wife, try it.”

Later chinese called back: “It worked. Me better. You got nice house boss!”

Little 6-year old John Smith’s parents felt really horny at 11 AM on Sunday and wanted to make love, but had to get John away for at least one hour. So they told him to go to the balcony and report all activities of their neighbours for the next hour. Being the innocent, dutiful son he was raised to be, he did as he was told.

His parents amused themselves, and then came the formality of the report at 12 PM.

John said “For the past hour, the Wilsons were watching TV, Mr. Cole was playing the piano, the Johnsons were playing carrom together and the Donalds were having sex.”

His parents were shocked! They asked him “How do you know that?” He said “Their son was out on the balcony too.”

Weather: Partly Crappy

Trail Conditions: Nice on a side by side with a roof and windshield

Slow start today.  My Macbook was stuck after OS updates and wouldn’t do a think.  I typed that in my iPhone and it told me to do a SMC reset.  I had to hold down four keys at the same time and whalah…….. No sure if I should be happy or pissed but it works just fine now. LOL

Looks like a chance of rain today and Sunday, actually a big chance on Sunday right now. I gotta run, taking Mom to Ironwood to shop for food for the visit from the Brothers this weekend.  It should be fun, it’s been a while since we were all together.


A man was telling his buddy “You won’t believe what happened last night.

My daughter walked into the living room and said, “Dad, cancel my allowance immediately, forget my college tuition loan, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out the window, take my TV and my laptop. Please take any of my jewelry to the Salvation Army or Cash Converters.

Then, sell my car, take my front door key away from me and throw me out of the house. Then, disown me and never talk to me again. Don’t forget to write me out of your will and leave my share to any charity you choose.”
“Holy Smokes,” replied the friend, “she actually said that?”
“Well, she didn’t put it quite like that. She actually said,

‘Dad, meet my new boyfriend– Mohammed. We’re going to work together on Hillary’s election campaign!'”

Have a view of lake Gogebic from your computer

Weather: Beautiful outside

Trail Conditions: Ready for a ride

Mid 70’s today, a bit too warm but what the hell.  It is just gorgeous this morning.  Did you check out the new webcam on the lake yet? Click here (Use Chrome, Safari or Firefox instead of Internet Explorer)

An illegal immigrant picks up a hooker.
 “Hey, how much you charge for da hour, sister?” he asks.
 “$100” she replies.
In broken English, he says, “Do you do immigrant style?”
 “No” she says.
 “I pay you $200 to do immigrant style.” 
“No,” she says, not knowing what immigrant style is.

“I pay you $300.”

“No,” she says.

“I pay you $400.”

“No,” she says.

So finally he says, “OK, I pay $1,000 to do immigrant style”. 
She thinks, “Well, I’ve been in the game for over 10 years now. I’ve had every kind of request from weirdos from every part of the world. How bad could immigrant style be?” So she agrees and has sex with him.

Finally, after several hours, they finish.

Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says, “Hey, I was expecting something perverted and disgusting.  But that was ok. So, what exactly is immigrant style?”

The illegal immigrant replies,  “You send bill to U.S.Government.”

New webcam running on Bergland Bay

Weather: Nice for a few days maybe

Trail Conditions: No Dust

It wasn’t too bad yesterday, most of the rain happened before morning yesterday.  Now it is supposed to be nice for a few days.

I got a little bit of work done yesterday.  And most importantly I got the webcam going down on Bergland Bay.  Check it out live on the live webcam pge.  It is under the Sled Lot link. (I need to load software on my computer to fix that link description) But it works for now.

A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door. She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady, “Do you have a Vagina?” She slams the door in disgust. The next morning she hears a knock at the door, its the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, “Do you have a Vagina?” She slams the door again. Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, “Honey, I am taking an off tomorrow so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again.” The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door. The husband whispers to the wife, “Honey, im going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to a see where he’s going with this.” She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, “Do you have a Vagina?” “Yes I do.” says the lady. The man replies, “Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife’s alone and start using yours!”

Gonna storm today in Bergland

Weather: It’s gonna rain

Trail Conditions: No Dust

Looks like rain and thunder storms are a coming.  This is straight from my weather rock in the back yard.  So chances are 100%.  I gotta go clean rentals, got company coming this weekend.

Other than that not much to say today, it must be time for me to do something stupid so I have something to write about.  Now if I can only find my taser LOL……..