Weather: Low 80’s and overcast.
A little break in the weather today, maybe a shower tonight to cool things off a bit. I had a late night in the bar, been I while since I stayed open till closing time on a Monday. The guys from Wisconsin are up cutting the hay fields and they were pretty thirsty when they came in.
Phil was bragging to his friend Don one day, “You know, I
know everyone der is to know. Yust name someone, anyone, and I know them.”
Tired of his boasting, Don called his bluff, “OK, Phil how about Tom
“Sure, yes, Tom and I ver old friends, and I can prove it.”
Phil and Don fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door,
and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, “Phil! Great to see you! You and
your friend come right in and join me for lunch!”
Although impressed, Don is still skeptical. After they leave
Cruise’s house, he tells Phil that he thinks his knowing Cruise was
“No, no, just name anyvon else,” Phil says.
”President Obama,” Don quickly retorts.
“Ya sure,” Phil says, “I know him. We’ll fly out to Washington to see
him.” Off they go.
At the White House, Obama spots Phil on the tour and motions him and
Don over, saying, “Phil, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a
meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a cup of
coffee first and catch up.”
Don is shaken now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds, Don expresses his doubts to
Phil, who again implores him to name anyone else.
“The Pope”, Don replies. “Sure!” says Phil. “I’ve known the Pope a
The unconvinced Don flies them off to Rome. Phil and Don are
assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Phil says; “This will
never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye among all these people. Tell
you what, I know the guards so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out
on the balcony with the Pope.” He disappears into the crowd headed
toward the Vatican.
Fifteen minutes later Phil emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
By the time Phil returns, Don has had a heart attack and is
surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his Don ‘s side, Phil asks
him, “What happened?”
Don looks up and says, “I was doing fine until you and the Pope
came out on the balcony and the Japanese tourist next to me asked,
‘Who’s that on the balcony with Phil?