5-4-16

Weather: Gloomy again.

After today it is warm weather and sunshine. Might even go for that Sloppy Hoppy on Friday. Becker made it home yesterday, I’m not sure if there are any shells or rocks left in Florida.

Wife – “Where the hell have you been? You said you’d be done with golf by noon!”

Husband – “I’m so sorry Honey… but you probably don’t want to hear the reason.”

Wife – “I want the truth and I want it NOW!”  

Husband – “Fine. We finished in under 4 hours, quick beer in the clubhouse, I hopped in the car, and would have been here at 12 on the button. ….. 

 

On the way home, I spotted a girl half our age struggling with a flat tire. I changed it in a jiffy, and next she’s offering me money. Of course I refuse it – then she tells me she was headed to the bar at the Sheraton – and begs me to stop so she

 can buy me a beer. She’s such a sweetie, I said yes. 
             Before you know it – one beer turned to three or four and I guess we were looking

                 pretty good to each other. Then she tells me she has a room at the Sheraton less than 50 steps from our table. She suggested we get some privacy while pulling me by the hand. 
             Now I’m in her room….clothes are flying …… the talking  stopped….and we proceeded  to have sex in every way imaginable. It must have gone on for hours, because before

                 I know it the clock says 5:30. …… I jumped up, threw my clothes on, ran to the car, and here I am. …………
There. You wanted the truth….you got it.” 

Wife – “Bullshit! You played 36 holes, didn’t you!” 

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