7-6-17

Weather: Beautiful, thunder storms, sunshine, thunder storms, more sunshine.

Becker and I were in the lake til about 1am. The skeeters sucked but we kept smoking and putting on off. LOL on off. We floated around on a tube, drinking beer and BSing. It doesn’t get any better than that.

 

SIMPLE TRUTH 1:

Lovers help each other undress before sex.
However after sex, they always dress on their own.
Moral of the story — In life, no one helps you once you’re screwed.
SIMPLE TRUTH 2:
When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch the stomach and say, “Congrats”.
But, none of them comes up to the man – touches his penis and say, “Good job”.
Moral of the story — Hard work is rarely appreciated.
FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE:
1. Money cannot buy happiness – but it’s far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy – but remember the asshole’s name.
3. If you help someone when they’re in trouble – they will remember you when they’re in trouble again.    
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems – but then neither does milk.
AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE ….
5. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
BONUS RULE:
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex.
A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman’s husband

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