Trail Conditions: Grades are good.
72 and sunny. Late start today, not feeling like doing a damn thing, but I got to go get er done. Now if I can figure out what the hell “er” is for today I can start.
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice on reviving her husband’s libido. “What about trying Viagra?” asked the doctor.
Not a chance she replied. He won’t even take an aspirin.”
“Not a problem” said the doctor. “Give him an Irish Viagra.”
“What is Irish Viagra?” she asked.
“It’s Viagra dissolved in a cup of coffee. He won’t even taste it. Let me know how it goes” he said.
She called the doctor the next day. “How did it go?” he asked.
“Oh faith, begosh and begorrah, doctor, it was horrid. Just terrible, I tell ya!! I’m beside meself!”
“Really? What in the world happened?”
“Well, I did as you advised. The Viagra in his coffee took effect right almost immediately. He jumped straight up, with a smile on his face, a twinkle in his eye and his pants a-bulging fiercely. With one swoop of his arm he sent the cups and saucers flying across the room, then he ripped me clothes to tatters and passionately took me then and there on top of the table. Twas a nightmare, I tell ya, an absolute nightmare!”
Why so terrible” asked the doctor, “Wasn’t the sex good?”
“Freakin day, it was the best sex I’ve had in 25 years, but sure as I’m sittin here, doctor, I’ll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again”