Three golfing partners, J, Mark and Jeff died in a car wreck and went to heaven. Upon
arrival they discover the most beautiful golf course they have ever seen.
St. Peter tells them that they are all welcome to play the course, but he
cautions them that there is only one rule:
Don’t hit the ducks in your first three months here!!!
The men all have blank expressions, and finally one of them asks, “The
“Yes”, St. Peter replies, “There are millions of ducks walking around the
course and if one gets hit, he quacks then the one next to him quacks and
soon they’re all quacking to beat the band and it really breaks the
tranquility. If you hit the ducks, you’ll be punished, otherwise everything
is yours to enjoy.”
Upon entering the course, the men noted that there were indeed large
numbers of ducks everywhere.
Within fifteen minutes, J hit a duck. The duck quacked, the
one next to it quacked and soon here was a deafening roar of duck quacks.
St. Peter walked up to J with an extremely homely woman in tow and asks, “Who
hit the duck?”
J admitted, “I did.”
St. Peter immediately pulled out a pair of handcuffs and cuffed J’s
right hand to the homely woman’s left hand.
“I told you not to hit the ducks,”, he said. Now you’ll be handcuffed
together for eternity.”
Mark and Jeff were very cautious not to hit any ducks, but a couple of
weeks later, Mark accidentally did.
The quacks were as deafening as before and within minutes St. Peter walked
up with an even uglier woman.
St. Peter cuffed Mark’s right hand to the homely woman’s left hand. “I
told you not to hit the ducks,” he said; “Now you’ll be handcuffed together
Jeff was extremely careful. Some days he wouldn’t even move for
fear of even nudging a duck. After three months of this Jeff still hadn’t hit
St. Peter walked up to Jeff at the end of the three months and had with
him a knock-out gorgeous woman, the most beautiful woman the man had ever
seen. St. Peter smiled at Jeff and then, without a word, handcuffed him
to the beautiful woman and walked off.
Jeff, knowing that he would be handcuffed to this woman for eternity,
let out a contented sigh and wondered aloud, “I wonder what I did to deserve
The woman responds, “I don’t know about you, but I hit a duck.”