Archive for September 20, 2015


Weather: Warmer and sunny skies.

Happy Sunday everyone. Sunny and warmer for the next few days. I think in the 9 years I have been up here that this has been the nicest summer yet. Business at the bar has been good also, Becker and I have been able to take off more and let the girls work more. Everyone has been happy. (except Uncle Dale and Dave from Antigo who think I only work 2 hours a week).

September is going quick, the leaves are turning and you can tell by the night air that the season is changing. We did see more ATV and side by side traffic, more motorcycle traffic too this summer. Hopefully that trend continues. Talked to a lot of people that came up here for their first time during non-snowmobile season.

We have a long way to go to make the ORV trails rival our snowmobile trails, but the ORV clubs are doing all they can, we have a lot of Federal Forests, wetlands and private property that are hard to turn into trails. But slowly they are improving every year. Fall colors should be in full bloom probably in about 4 weeks, good time to take a ride up and enjoy the UP.

To all the people I know that went to Chicago to see ACDC, I though of you when I seen this…..

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Weather: A bit cooler but sunny skies.

Had a good day yesterday, got 6 houses sprayed. Mom got the word that they are closing on her condo on Monday, it will be great to have that one finalized. She will rest a lot easier with only having one residence.

The bar will be open at noon today and tomorrow, Gay please tell Ralph.

Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives. “Do you and your wife ever do it doggie style?” asked the one. “Well, not exactly.” His friend replied, “She’s more into the trick dog aspect of it.” “Oh, I see, kinky, huh?” “Well, not exactly. I sit up and beg, and she rolls over and plays dead.”


Weather: Back to nice weather.

Not a lot of rain yesterday, a little thunder lightening. It was supposed to rain all day but most of it missed us. Hopefully that does not happen this winter.

It is still up in the air whether I am going to pick mom up tomorrow. So I can’t say for sure if the bar will be open at noon or at 2pm on Saturday.


A dog lover, whose dog was a female and “in heat’, agreed to look
after her neighbor’s male dog while the neighbors were on vacation. She had a large house and believed that she could keep the two dogs apart. However, as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds, rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together in obvious pain and unable to disengage, as so frequently happens when dogs mate.

Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late, she called the vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice. Having explained the problem to him, the vet said,

“Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs. I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw.”

Do you really think that will work?” she asked.
“Just worked for me,” he replied.


Weather: Rain.

Temps are still holding in the 60 & 70’s for the next week. Great weather for Late September. Trees are turning more and more everyday, it won’t be long before the forest is in full bloom. If you have never seen our forests in full bloom then I would say it is time to plan a nice fall ride on an ATV. Timberline Sports is renting side by sides, come on up and see it for yourselves.


My sister asked me to take off her clothes. So I took off her shirt. Then she said, “Take off my skirt.” So I took off her skirt. “Take off my shoes.” I took off her shoes. “Now take off my bra and panties.” So I took them off. Then she looked at me and said, “I don’t want to catch you wearing my things ever again.”


Weather: Very nice.

Uncle Dale you hurt me with the Crown Royal last night. But we did solve a lot of the worlds problems. Gotta get busy paying bills, have a good day everyone.

A guy and his wife are sitting and watching a boxing match on television. The husband sighs and complains, “This is disappointing. It only lasted for 30 seconds!” “Good,” replied his wife. “Now you know how I always feel.”


Weather: Summertime in the UP.

Time to go on a rant. No not about the rider with the small penises and loud pipes or the ones hogging both sides of the trails. We live in Michigan, and most people up here are Packer fans. Don’t get me wrong I like the Packers and I think Aaron Rodgers is one of the best quarterback to play the game. But give me a fricken break, the Lions played the late game, they were on FOX. Do you know what was on FOXUP at 4pm Sunday? European soccer. Who the hell cares about European soccer in the UP. Who ever is in charge of television programming is an asshole and an idiot.

On the first day of school a first grade teacher explained to her class that she was a Bears fan. She asked her students to raise their hands if they, too, were Bears fans. Wanting to impress their teacher, everyone in the class raised their hand except one little girl.
The teacher looked at the girl with surprise and asked, “Janie, why didn’t you raise your hand?” “Because I’m not a Bears fan,” she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked, “Well, if you are not a Bears fan, then who are you a fan of?” “I am a Packers fan, and proud of it,” Janie replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. “Janie please tell us why you are a Packers fan?” “Because my mom is a Packers fan, and my dad is Packers fan, so I’m a Packers fan too!”
“Well,” said the teacher in an obviously annoyed tone, “that is no reason for you to be a Packers fan. You don’t have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was an idiot and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?”
“Then,” Janie smiled, “I’d be a Bears fan.”


Weather: 80 degrees today.

Sounds like summer is not giving up. Sure does not look like fall weather. You can thank me for pulling the boat out of the water.

Well a happy Sunday for Packer fans, too bad the Lions did not fare as well. Actually the Lions game looked like the Bears, good at first, bad when it counted in the end.

A patient says, “Doctor, can I get AIDS from a toilet seat?” The doctor replies, “Yes, but only by sitting down before the last guy gets up.”


Weather: Back to 70 and 80 degrees.

Sounds like we have a crew coming to the bar to watch the Bear’s game today. Everyone seemed so excited last night, wow did know they liked watching the Bears in the UP. LOL

Thanks my Iowa friends, have a safe ride home.

Looking for that perfect sled head stocking stuffer, look no further. Justin’s snowmobile club is selling calendars. They can also be followed on Facebook at Honey Riders Snowmobile Calendar.


An elderly couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. 

        Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. 

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. 

They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on. 

Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. 

‘How do you feel about sex?’ he asked, rather tentatively. 

‘I would like it infrequently’ she replied. 

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards her and whispered – 

‘Is that one word or two?’ 



Weather: 38 degrees at 8am.

Getting pretty close to frost of the pumpkin time. Also I think the cold nights help the colors on the trees to change too. It is that time of year when anything can happen. Although we need it to get cold before we get snow this year. Last November was a mess up here. Remember 90 inches of snow between November 8-20. It screwed up deer season along with making it a very hard start for snowmobile season. So hopefully Mother Nature will not put the cart before the horse this year.

OK so now that I have pissed off all the locals for talking about snow (morning Ralph) hopefully we will still have a lot more nice fall days before we get into “tis the season”.Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of ‘cocktails’, ‘highballs’ and just a good old-fashioned ‘stiff drink’. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Pfizer Corp. announced today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of ‘cocktails’, ‘highballs’ and just a good old-fashioned ‘stiff drink’. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer’s research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.


Weather: Only in the 50’s.

9-11 today. Hard to believe it was 14 years ago today.

Had a great ride with the folks from Iowa yesterday. In fact it was so much fun I think I’ll do it again today. We went to WhitePine, Ontonagon, Geenland and Rockland yesterday. Great time with great people. Oh yea, thanks to Bret and Dawn for the night cap, you guys rock.

A kid walks up to his mom and asks, “Mom, can I go bungee jumping?” The mom says “No, you were born from broken rubber and I don’t want you to go out the same way!”